Sigh.

No af.

No BFP.

Going INSANE.

Advertisements

Wow

I can’t believe it’s been so long since I’ve updated! I’m so sorry about that! We’ve been moving and it’s taking forever to get us all settled in!

Needless to say, EGS is very temporarily on hold–though we have had unprotected sex a few times… (3, 5 and 6 days before my calculated ovulation and 18 hours after. This, of course, is assuming I ovulated at all–something I’m not convinced of.) but so far, all hpt’s have come out negative. I even took a FRER today and that was negative. I will test again with my test strips pretty much for the next 5 days and use one more FRER (maybe…) on the 6th day, then I shall give up hope.

We didn’t do EGS–but we did everything else. Diet, supplements, even timing to an extent, so if I actually was pregnant and we got another boy, I would still feel pretty confident that we’d done our best (minus EGS, of course) with just out and out swaying. I’m not sure that we’ll be doing EGS July, either. And to be quite frank, the diet is getting so old. Ok–I won’t lie. It’s not getting old, it is old. I don’t think that I can keep it up anymore. It’s not that I am hungry all the time–I’m actually kinda full–it’s just the blandness is killing me! We’re also both getting really sick of taking so many pills. Ugh!

It’s so weird.. I feel so pregnant, yaknow? I’m peeing constantly, even though I’ve actually been drinking less than normal (yes, I actually know pretty much exactly how much I drink every day!). I had a little experiment last night. I went to bed thirsty (I generally take a bottle of water to bed with me and sip it throughout the night) and I didn’t have anything to drink two hours before I went to sleep. And I still got up four times to pee during the night! That’s one less than the five times a night it’s been for the past 6 days… but so not worth being thirsty throughout the night!) Honestly? I wake up to pee twice a night max. Once a night is normal. This 4+ times per night thing sucks and it only ever happens when I’m pregnant.

But I’m obviously not 😦 I don’t have any other symptoms. No tender breasts, no sore hips, no nausea, no crazy fatigue (just the normal kind when you have a ton of kids :p). Usually when I’m pregnant, my hips are killing me. Literally killing me before I’m late for my period, my breasts get larger (though to be honest, I’m still nursing, so chances are I won’t notice that, anyway) I guess I could be considered overly tired… I slept like the dead last night (aside from the constant urination), the kids didn’t wake up at all (a first!) and I slept so deeply, it was awesome. Yet I woke up feeling like I hadn’t slept in a week. And all day, at any point, if I didn’t have to watch kiddos all day, I’d have drifted off (Oh, I wish they weren’t past the nap stage…) . Like right now, one kid is still awake and I’m just dragging, even though I haven’t even been up for 12 hours! Literally!

So yeah.. I don’t know what’s going on with my body. Unless it’s just me mentally convincing my body that I’m pregnant (all that positive thinking I’ve been doing!) Whatever it is, it is so frustrating. Ugh.  At this point in time, I just want af to show up so we can start trying. This being in limbo crap sucks!

I will try to keep this updated, now. I’m so sorry! Now that we’re (mostly) moved and settled, I should be able to keep this up again 🙂

ETA: On the 4th of July, I was actually woken up at about 3AM with the most awful cramps. You wouldn’t believe it. It was.. it was just crazy painful. This is what I wrote in my “personal” journal:

My stomach is killing me. Like omg this morning around 3AM I actually woke up because I felt like I was having contractions O_O;; Honestly.. wtf? You’d think I’d be starting my period after that.. but no. Nothing. I have no freaking clue what THAT was. And I’m sore from it, today. Like my stomach is still kinda crampy, though honestly I don’t know WHY. AF isn’t due for some time, seeing as she just ended on the 22nd [after SIX long day. SIX. wtf, body???] I’d say Ovulation pains.. but I’ve never had them before and I don’t imagine they feel like freaking contractions. Plus, my cervix is in the entirely wrong position for ovulation. Mucous is all wrong, too. So yeah. No f***ing clue what’s going on with my uterus these days. I haven’t ovulated in.. well.. ages. Yeah. Anyone have ovulation pain? Does it kinda feel like you’re having contractions? Or has anyone had this sort of pain and know wtf it is? Flabbergasted, here, honestly.

ETA: And no, I don’t think it’s PMSy type cramps. I’ve had those before. These pains do NOT feel ANYthing like that y.y Plus.. yaknow.. like I said before.. I *just* got off a ridiculously LONG period and if I’m starting again ALREADY I demand a refund on my uterus. Srsly.

How weird is that? My friends suggested implantation–one actually said that I’d described how one of her kids felt with implantation. And it was the appropriate time span… so of course, that got me feeling pregnant, even more! But I don’t know. All those negative tests… just.. yeah.